Lessons Learned The Hard Way
by Alexis Marie
Lessons Learned The Hard Way….
Sometimes when you love something you have to set it free. And I loved you, but I let you go, because I love me more. Happiness > self sacrifice; it wasn’t because of Love that I stayed with you when I knew you were lying, nor was it Love that made me stay when you were violent, I was just weak minded – I couldn’t think outside the box, because I had isolated myself so much that the only thing outside myself was you; you were all I knew.
Lessons Learned The Hard Way….There will always be that one person that loves you less, and that one person that loves you more; and I gave my all to you, only knowing how because someone once gave their all to me; and the fact that everything crumbled and slipped through my fingers is merely Karma showing me what my momma went through, I didn’t know loving someone could be so hard until you, and now I understand why she felt so hopeless raising me. Lessons Learned The Hard Way: my only saving grace is that she no longer remembers me, and thus no longer remembers the pain I put her through, under the guise called L-O-V-E. Self Sacrifice > Happiness – for her happiness now, my memory is my sacrifice.
Lessons Learned The Hard Way….Nothing really lasts forever; the present makes way for the future by becoming the past, and there’s no such thing as making memories, because memories don’t last – they fade away like faded words on crumbling pages in old books, dusty, unopened, passed their ripened age or mint condition; and the older we become the less we remember.
That’s why my blog’s like my diary – my imprint that I was once alive and felt something for another human soul – because one day, I’ll forget these emotions like my mother before me; just like everybody else; My Milennial Generation will turn Silent, and traces of me will be hidden away in Internet Archives Archived by The Library of Congress; and the newer generations won’t think to look for my history, and I will fade away, back to dirt and dust and bone, like everything else. Lessons Learned The Hard Way….This is what we call The Cycle of Life…….and that in itself, is a Lesson Learned The Hard Way.
Lessons Learned The Hard Way….You’re really on your own, you know? Because Life is a feeling process and navigating the web of lies and strife of life is a different experience for everyone. So who am I to tell you how to feel, and who am I to write to you, as if my words can help you understand and heal, when we can only save ourselves?
When these words are just my way of navigating through the confusion I’ve been feeling, that I’ve not found any answers towards; will you reading this give me the answers I seek? Tell me what first hand advice you have for me, when you are outside of my skin, and I outside of yours? And it’s a Lesson Learned The Hard Way, because we always try to save each other when we’ve yet to save ourselves; sometimes the hardest thing to do is to focus on yourself.
And that’s why I’ll say again: That’s why my blog’s like my diary – my imprint that I was once alive and felt something for another human soul – because one day, I’ll be forgotten, like everyone else; My Milennial Generation will turn Silent, and traces of me will be hidden away in Internet Archives Archived by The Library of Congress; and even though I’m Black, I’m not Maya Angelou or Rosa Parks, Coretta Scott King or Sandra Bland; so the newer generations won’t think to look for my history; so I will fade away, back to dirt and dust and bone; because the present makes way for the future by becoming the past, so these chapters of my life will one day fade away like faded words on crumbling pages of worn books passed their ripened age or mint condition, and beyond repair.
Lessons Learned The Hard Way….and this is what we call The Cycle of Life; and that in itself, is a Lesson Learned The Hard Way…..
Copyright, Marie Meyers. Lessons Learned The Hard Way Project. 2017. All Rights Reserved.