It’s not often that I cry anymore, 

which is a step up from just months before, years before, feeling everything go wrong, 

two months ago, crying way too much, broke the promise I made to love myself…

At the start of last year I got that tattoo, to remind me to live when life brought me down, 

just Live…,

‘Cause life is precious, Alexis, so slide in the driver side of that Lexus, and drive…cruisin’ on city streets, no highways, see the life that God made, 

just Live…, 

Because life is a beautiful thing, and you know that, it’s a mystery, and you know that, your palms sweat, your heart beats fast…

It excites you – entices you – to dream, to reach, to grasp, to breach…to taste its sweet nectar, seduction with no censor, a caress with the right amount of pressure…. 

Live…, and I knew that I needed to, knew that I wanted to, but couldn’t figure how to without you, 

I couldn’t remember my aspirations, I couldn’t find my inspirations, too fed up with limitations…to Live, weighed down by the What If mindset, stuck on the same If Only subject, too much anger with no outlet… 

To Live, and I thought I’d die,

like that, that night, wasn’t doing nothing right, couldn’t hear the voice of God…and I can’t really explain what happened next, can’t put it in words, but when I woke up the next morning it wasn’t in Heaven, and I felt just fine, I felt alive, 

Now I just Live, and I don’t over think it, I just Live, inhaling the crisp winter air, 

I just Live……

©Marie Meyers, 2016

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